Its the Music

 

I think, for me, its the music. There are songs that sorta transport me to another world. Different songs for different reasons and the type of song does not necessarily always fit the classic girlish type of songs but excitingly and surprisingly sometimes they are. For example, there are songs such as Hey Mickey, Tomorrow from Annie, and a few selections from the Norma Jean CPK series that do a great job of blocking out the every day blahs and issues and transporting me to a place with happy valleys, trees and little birds.... ecch... its a side of me that I can't hide from ... go figure. Then there are songs such as my collection of cheerleading tracks that I know I can close my eyes and see myself along with my entire dream squad on the gym floor waiting for that first bass note of our performance music to drop so that the adrenaline in our little hearts can explode, dazzle, amaze the crowd. Even though I have never done a single back flip in my little life I can close my little eyes and look to my left and look to my right and see the other girls on my squad as we execute multiple perfect back flips. I can see our parents jumping up and screaming as the music ends in a succession of deep booms. Then there are the songs that .... I know I can feel my LG spirit soar but might not be considered stereotypical LG songs. A few songs from Evenessence I know really hit and connected with my LG heart big time. Those are songs that are for the bad days that.... well lets just leave it at that ... the bad days....... giggle.

The last songs are the songs that existed already in my soul before I understood and accepted Karen Marie. These were the songs that she was humming and softly singing inside of me all during the early years. These songs range from Celtic sonnets and ballads to some of the Spice Girls softer and sweeter songs. Recently I was able to pickup the Songs for Worship Kids version, its sorta like Kids Bop but with other children singing the words to popular religious songs. Nothing like blasting choir music and allowing your voice to blend in with the other kids voices. I will close with this, when I was going through some of my toughest opening LG awareness days it was songs from Bette Midler that hugged me and didn't show me the light at the end of the tunnel but held my doubts and my fears so that they never really got the opportunity to gain traction. Something about a few of her songs sit still and not fear the acceptance but with every note to embrace who and what I was. Basically I would close my eyes and picture a rehearsal in a hall and that she was singing to me, this little girl named Karen Marie. Nothing major or ground shaking just that she was singing to a little girl and I was her.

Meatloaf sang in a song that "the beat is yours forever" and "when Rock and Roll Dreams come true”. I wish I could get a few moments to thank all of those artists for the soundtrack that was playing in the background when all the special parts of Karen Marie finally began to come together.

THOUGHTS AND POEMS