| When I first heard about
camp I was kind of unsure of attending. When I heard all the LGs talking
about taking Ballet class I really started of pull back. Well the
reason is because I come from a family where all of my sisters attended
ballet classes along with other girls in the area. My sisters started
from almost toddler and continued until each went to college. This
ballet school was spread throughout a few schools and Rec. Centers
in my town and each year they would have two large ballet recitals
that would be held in a local high school. Each year, until the girls
reached teenage years, it seemed that same song and dance routine
were performed again by the girls in the classes of the year before.
I guess it was sort of a measuring stick, it gave the young girls
something to look forward to. Each young girl could say to herself
"next year I will be performing the same routine that my older
sisters did". And it also let the older ones look back and say
"I remember when I did that routine and look how I have progressed."
Each year I would sit in that dark theater next to my parents watching
my sisters perform. My dad would tease me saying "hey, maybe
we should put you into ballet". Each year he would make that
so called threat and every year I would wish that he would follow
through with the threat. So there I would sit. Each year the ballet
instructors would announce the age group of the class next to perform
and I would say to myself "I'm supposed to be up there, that’s
my age group,that's my class, and there is where I would have been
standing..My spot would have been between her and her...." Well
when I heard that ballet was to be offered at LG Camp it saddened
me. In my mind when I think of taking ballet at LG Camp the only thing
that I can think about is what I missed when I was young. In my mind
"MY" ballet class had already performed and had moved on
years ago. What upset me is the fact that unlike my sisters I will
never have the "family ballet tradition" of a large ballet
recital like them with my parents and friends from my town all watching.
So I give this page of my websight to a lady that never knew who I
was. When my mother would drag me along in the car to "pick up"
my sisters from their weekly ballet class I would sit there in the
lobby of the Rec. center wishing and waiting to one day be on the
other side of the ballet class doors. Every time the door would open
and I could see Ms Marie teaching my sisters and the other girls wishing
that I was in line with them. Every once in a while after my sister’s
weekly classes my mother would stop and talk to Ms. Marie, and I would
just stand there waiting for Ms Marie to end my suffering and say
"when will you son be joining the ballet company?" Like
as with my fathers threat to make me join, Ms Marie’s offer
to join never came. Now looking back if I had the courage I would
have first, told my father to go ahead with his threat and secondly
I would have politely asked Ms. Marie if I could join the ballet class
in my age group the next week. oh well what’s past is past,
all I can do now honor a lady who I wished that I could have known
as a teacher and as a mentor. I always said that I did not chose the
name "Karen", God gave it to me, but when I decided to attach
a second name to my first name I knew only one name that sounded right
"Marie". So that when I think of my name, "Karen Marie"
I will always remember to seize the day and speak up for what I want.
If you have Midi capabilities on your computer and the sound is turned
on, the midi sample that is playing is taken from a Prince song "I
would Die for You." The last ballet recital of my sister’s
that I was able to attend this song was performed by the ballet class
that I would have been a member of. Ms. Marie, if you are ever able
to read this I just want to let you know that I would have been one
of your favorite students and how one day I would have been made it
to the "Senior Company." I would have loved to have been
able to perform "America." |
|
